B-Cack Goes Postal
(I will introduce my former LRS team mate B-Cack. He is still serving our nation as a high speed AH-64 pilot. I don't mind him cursing, 'cause I haven't put the reactive armor on my house yet and he has my address, and like I said he's still serving so I guess he gets to have some leaway. enjoy Dr. Phat Tony)
So no sh** there I am minding my own f**king business standing in line to buy some stamps when all of a sudden I remember there are the vending machines in the lobby. I f**king hate to wait in lines, and I do whatever I can to avoid this whenever possible. So I cut out of line to get over on some blue hairs that have nothing better to do, and make my way over to the stamp-o-matic machines. Of course all I have is a twenty dollar bill and was a little hesitant to put it in the slot, I have been ripped off by enough godd**n coke machines for one dollar to know that by putting in something that large is only asking for trouble. Being the dumb**s that I am, I slide Mr. Jackson right into the slot, and proceed to purchase my book of stamps.
Now, I don't know if you have ever used these before, but they give you change back in the form of the Sacagawea Dollar, which is kind of cool. Ok stamps are bought, the book comes out and I am good to go.... here is where the fun starts ... ha ha ha... So I hit the "done" button and look down for my change... and what do I see start to fill the slot but NICKLES... yeah no sh**... NICKLES.... Of course all of the blue hairs in the lobby start to salivate at the sound of a nickel hitting the bottom of a change tray... they think I have hit the triple double out at the Indian Casino or something. I thought it was kind of funny at first..... but when the pennies started to fall and the change tray was nearly full, I started to get a little pissed off....... What the f**k am I going to do with $12.30 in pennies and nickels? Yeah so I had a pocketful of change, it weighed quite a bit, but was producing a bulge that would be the envy of any porn star... what the f**k.. only me.. I felt like throwing it all in the lobby and watching the old people fight for it.... or the postal workers scurry to clean it up.. but then I remembered that I WAS in the post office and that there would be no rush to clean it up... F**k it... maybe I will drink a Natural Lite and throw some nickels down at the Casino...