Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Who's in China

Secretary: - Mr. President, Condoleeza Rice is here to see you.

George B. : - Good, send her in.

Secretary: - Yessir.
(Hangs up. Condi enters.)

Condoleeza: - Good morning, Mr. President.

George B. : - Oh Condoleeza, nice to see you. What's happening?

Condoleeza : - Well, Mr. President, I have the report here about the new leader in China.

George B. : - Great, Condi. Lay it on me.

Condoleeza : - Mr. President, Hu is the new leader of China.

George B. : - Well, that's what I want to know.

Condoleeza : - But that's what I'm telling you, Mr. President.

George B. : - Well, that's what I'm asking you, Condie. Who is the new leader of China?

Condoleeza : - Yes.

George B. : - I mean the fellow's name.

Condoleeza : - Hu.

George B. : - The guy in China.

Condoleeza : - Hu.

George B. : - The new leader of China.

Condoleeza : - Hu.

George B. : - The Chinaman!

Condoleeza : - Hu is leading China, Mr. President.

George B. : - Whaddya' asking me for?

Condoleeza : - I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George B. : - Well, I'm asking you, Condie. Who is leading China?

Condoleeza : - That's the man's name.

George B. : - That's who's name?

Condoleeza : - Yes.

George B. : - Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?

Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.

George B. : - Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condoleeza : - That's correct.

George B. : - Then who is in China?

Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.

George B. : - Yassir is in China?

Condoleeza : - No, sir.

George B. : - Then who is?

Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.

George B. : - Yassir?

Condoleeza : - No, sir.
(Pause. Crumples paper)

George B. : - Condi, you're starting to piss me off now, and it's not 'cause you're black neither. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. So why don't you get me the Secretary General of the United Nations on the phone.

Condoleeza : - Kofi Annan?

George B. : - No, thanks. And Condi, call me George. Stop with that ebonics crap.

Condoleeza : - You want Kofi?

George B. : - No.

Condoleeza : - You don't want Kofi.

George B. : - No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.

Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.

George B. : - Not Yassir! The guy at the United Nations.

Condoleeza : - Kofi?

George B. : - Milk! Will you please make that call?

Condoleeza : - And call who?

George B. : - Well, who is the guy at the U.N?

Condoleeza : - No, Hu is the guy in China.

George B. : - Will you stay out of China?!

Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.

George B. : - And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condoleeza : - Kofi.

George B. : - All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condoleeza : - Hello. Rice, here.

George B. : - Rice? Good idea. And get a couple of egg rolls, too, Condi. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get chinese food in the Middle East? I don't know.

Hat tip to Pop. Listen to the whole thing here


At 6:57 AM, Blogger a4g said...


At 9:08 AM, Anonymous Steve said...

That was funny

At 9:48 AM, Anonymous Fitch said...

Carnival Funny. Also the link is broken.

At 10:23 AM, Blogger Dan Trabue said...

My wife and I did this as a skit at our church retreat last year. Funny.

At 10:25 AM, Blogger The Conservative UAW Guy said...

Heh, indeed!

At 12:07 PM, Blogger Tyler D. said...


At 12:47 PM, Blogger Uber said...

Very amusing! Yes indeedy.

At 1:36 PM, Blogger Nightcrawler said...

Beautiful! Absolutely hilarious. Bravo Zulu DPT!

At 5:10 PM, Blogger kateykakes said...

It's been awhile since I've seen that one. It's as funny now as the first time I read it. Definitely a classic.

Thanks much for the laughs, Doc. :)

At 10:23 PM, Blogger sandy said...

Abbott and Costello ride again. A classic never gets old. Really funny.

At 6:25 AM, Blogger Wyatt Earp said...

Great stuff as always, Doc!


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