Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Breaking News: Intercepted Call Leaked

Here at Phat Tony’s, we’re dedicated to bring you the latest news. Thanks to our crack whore reporting team, we have procured a leaked transcript of an intercepted call between a suspected Al Quida terrorist and an American citizen. You can only find this kind of reporting here at Dr. Phat Tony’s.

recording started

ring ring

American citizen: Assalamy’alaikum. Larry’s Mosque and 24 hour tanning, this is Larry, how can I help you? Allah be praised.

Suspected terrorist: Alaikum assalmy. Yes, Larry, (muffled giggling)… My name is Bin La…um… Bin Babbaganoosh and I’m looking for my friend Mike Hunt, could you page him for me.

Larry: Sure, give me one moment please. muffled: Mike Hunt you have a call at the front desk. If anyone has seen Mike Hunt please send him to the front desk.

Bin: (muffled laughter muffled: stop laughing Al, this is never going to work if he hears you.)

Larry: I’m sorry Mr. Babbaganoosh, I can’t seem to find Mike Hunt at the moment. Would you like for me to take a message?

Bin: Actually you might be able to help me. Allah be praised. Mike was telling me you had a problem with your refrigerator. (muffled laughter muffled: shhh) Could you tell me if your refrigerator is running?

Larry: Uhh, I didn’t hear about any problem with the refrigerator. Hold on one second while I go check.

Bin (muffled: I can’t believe he’s going to check. muffled laughter)

Larry: I went and checked the refrigerator and, Allah be praised, it is indeed running.

Bin: Well you better go catch it before it get’s away. (hysterical laughter)

Larry: You son of a goat. I declare Jihad on you. If I ever see you, Allah have mercy, I will remove you head from your body.

Bin: (hysterical laughter)


end recording


At 6:29 AM, Blogger Cove Rebel said...

Maybe he is hanging out with Mike Hawk. HA!

and FIRST!

At 7:20 AM, Blogger a4g said...

Just when I think the terrorist scum can't get any lower, they descend further into madness and barbarity.

I'm speechless.

At 8:23 AM, Blogger Ssssteve said...

Sheesh, you would think that larry guy could take a joke?!

At 8:23 AM, Blogger Dr. Phat Tony said...

I bet Larry was investigated thoroughly also. I think you know what I mean when I say "investigated".

At 9:48 AM, Anonymous MEGABRAD said...

Now that's what I'm talkin bout, Willis!

At 10:14 AM, Blogger PoP said...

See, I knew that the wire tapping was working.

At 10:26 AM, Blogger The Conservative UAW Guy said...

Funny, Doc!!

At 11:15 AM, Blogger Uber said...

Riveting, Doc. Further proving the necessity of wiretapping.

Son of a goat? ha Nice touch.

At 11:36 AM, Anonymous Kath said...

I actually know someone named Mike Hawk, and he doesn't think that joke is very funny.

At 5:48 PM, Blogger kateykakes said...

I remember years ago I was waitressing down in South Philly and we got a call for someone looking for "Mike Hunt". We were so busy so and I didn't give it a second thought when I called it out:

"There's a phone call for Mike Hunt. I'm looking for Mike Hunt.

Mike Hu...OMG! OMG!"

That's when I looked for the nearest hole to crawl into. I wanted to die!

My coworkers, one of whom had called looking for "Mike Hunt" were hysterical. I had a pretty good laugh too, and the customers must have felt sorry for me because I made good money that night! :)

At 9:50 PM, Anonymous FIAR said...

Where's Amanda Huggenkiss?


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