Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Customer Service; Now With Less Boobs

So like the previous story, I was sitting in the call bank answering phones and explaining to people their benefits. I then received a call that changed my view of the West Coast forever. A woman called me and said she was having problems scheduling a breast reduction surgery. She wanted the surgery done during the summer and it had been moved postponed till Christmas time. This is extremely strange because one the insurance does not cover plastic surgery unless it’s to repair damage done by an accident or a mastectomy and two the insurance company does not schedule surgeries. She informed me that she had the procedure authorized by the insurance company. I checked her schedule and did not find any authorization for a surgery for any date.

We went back and forth for a while until she finally spilled the beans. The breast reduction surgery wasn’t for her; it was for her twelve-year-old son. I check his authorization and, sure enough the insurance company had authorized a breast reduction surgery for a twelve-year-old boy. The reason it was so important that he get his boy boobs taken care of during the summer is so that the other kids at school would figure that he finally put down the sandwich and started doing some fraken push ups. If he had the surgery during Christmas break, everyone would know that his man boobs were sculpted, not by hard work and a little sweat but, by the steady hand of a plastic surgeon. This really upset the mother that people were going to tease her butter ball kid more than when he had man boobs. All the while this woman is lamenting the fate of the titty tuck being moved to Christmas, I’m wondering how the hell a parent would let their child go under the knife instead of working the little bastards boobs off through some exercise.

Anyway, the truth was that if she wanted her little pudgy kid to get his boobs done during the summer, she had to work out the date with the doctor and not us. Insurance companies don’t run doctors offices.

11 Comments:

At 7:54 PM, Blogger Contagion said...

Man do I have storeis that could go with this one... I'm so glad I don't work in the inquiry department anymore.

 
At 7:56 PM, Anonymous Money Matador said...

Great story! Did you abuse the woman? Did you tell her how stupid she is for neglecting her child? Or did you keep it friendly until she had hung up and could unload in your blog?

 
At 5:02 AM, Blogger Dr. Phat Tony said...

Every call to an insurance comapny is recorded to protect the insurance company. Many of times I wanted to unload on a customer but held back because I needed my job.

 
At 5:06 AM, Blogger PoP said...

Good story, son, but I'm highly disappointed. No pictures, and man boobs to boot. BOO HISS.

 
At 5:29 AM, Anonymous chris said...

So you aren't a real doctor?

I feel cheated.

 
At 9:44 AM, Blogger Dr. Phat Tony said...

You should probably disregard the advice I gave you about that rash you have then Chris.

 
At 9:58 AM, Blogger Ssssteve said...

Great story Doc, but I will have to disagree with Pops about the pics of the man boobs! Me no wanna see man boobs!!

 
At 11:02 AM, Anonymous Lil' B-Cack said...

ha ha! Floppy man teats!

 
At 12:24 PM, Blogger The Conservative UAW Guy said...

My brother always said if he had breasts he'd never leave the house...

 
At 9:36 PM, Blogger Insolublog said...

That could be read in soooo many ways, jimmyb.

 
At 2:36 PM, Anonymous Marcy said...

I saw a teenager (really overweight) this summer at our local waterpark with 'boy boobs' .. and boy, they were pretty big. Now what struck me as odd was this guy had no apparent shyness or psych problem ... he had friends, they all were having fun and no one seemed to care. But ... I could not help stare.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home